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Earlier in class, Brad said that if we did this correctly, "the neighbors should be jealous." Maybe even "a little scared," Kim added. As we exited our room an hour later, we got a little nod and a wink from a couple passing by.

The "Drive Your Partner Wild With Desire" class focused on the Tantra principle of using all five senses (i.e., sight, touch, smell, taste, and sound) to awaken your sexuality and increase your pleasure.

But in all seriousness, it's nice to know something like a little burp during what should've been a sexy moment didn't ruin our good time.

I've always prided myself on my hand-job skills, but Kim and Brad taught me a few new tricks. At the "Snake Charming" class, we learned penis-massage techniques I never even knew existed.

First came the feather, which John traced slowly and gently alongside my half-naked body. But then he slowly dripped juice from a piece of cantaloupe on to the middle part of my lips.

This we learned from Kim and Brad Walker of Houston-based Tantric Hearts, who have been teaching at Hedonism II for 17 years.

Even though Hedonism II wasn't exactly what we anticipated, we learned a lot. As we stood nude on our suite deck about to step out into the world of Hedo for the first time, I turned to John and said, "Oh my God. I can't do this." He handed me the bottle of champagne. Then he took my hand and escorted me to the poolside bar on the Nude side.

We giggled a bit with excitement, and the sense that we were in it together instantly made me feel closer to him.

Like any good student, I was prepared for class with a towel and an intimate cleansing cloth.

Little did we know that we'd need one more Snake Charming accoutrement: a rubber glove that left us mystified until we realized it was for a prostate massage where you insert a finger or two into your partner's anus and gently circle it around to massage his prostate from the inside.